it doesn’t matter how many “pretend to be dating” fics i read, i’m always fucking in it headfirst every time and i fall for that shit every time. i know the pattern i know the plot twists i know what’s gonna happen but every single fucking time i’m fucking on the edge of my seat wide-eyed whispering like “what’s gonna happen are they gonna fall in love” to myself like of course they are you fucking idiot this happens EVERY TIME but as soon as i see the description and it’s like “x person and x person pretend to do the dating” it’s eternal sunshine of the stupidest fucking mind over here
lol: lots of lesbians
rotfl: really open to friendly lesbians
lmao: lesbians make awesome omelettes
omg: oh my girls
ily: i love yuri
wtf: where’s the females
fyi: females… yes… interesting…
if you have a pet and i’ve ever visited your house: i’m sorry
at this point i dont even feel like a real person i’m just 50% sarcasm and 50% tv shows
do you ever just start watching a show because you hear there are lesbians
literally the only reason i do anything
do u ever look at girls and just sigh because you’re really gay like really fucking gay
"well, i read a lot"
"cool! what kind of stuff do you like to read?"
"oh, you know, mostly amateur erotica based on existing media franchises"
the whole like “you’re too young to be gay” shit like. queer people arent like pokemon you don’t level up enough to evolve into a gay.